Is there anything I can do about my ex-husband verbally abusing me?

by | Jul 26, 2016 | Ask the Lawyer | 0 comments

Question asked on Sep 24th, 2014

Q: My ex husband calls me and call me a ” fucking bitch” tells me I am “fucking retarded”. We have three children that we have joint custody of. I try very hard to co parent and work together for the sake of our children, but I am at my wits end. I can not take his abuse. Every day he calls or texts something disrespectful. Is there a legal avenue that I can take to get him to stop?

A: Short answer: “yes.”  First, consider acting on your own — export and print all such text messages and e-mails, use caller ID, do not answer, and if he leaves insulting messages, keep the recordings (perfectly allowable) but do NOT tape live conversation over the phone (not allowed).  Then consider a very neutrally worded letter basically telling him to confine his language to matters concerning the children, in decent language, and warning that if he does not, you will bring him back to court and ask that he get the opportunity to pay for that trip.

If the abuse does not stop, with the evidence in hand, do exactly that, seeing a qualified family law specialist, in this or some other family law firm, to file a motion for a behavioral order, with penalties attached to further violations.  Being someone’s verbal punching bag is no way to go through life, and you have a right to be treated decently and with respect — you simply have to insist on it.

Frequently Asked Questions

Is there anything I can do legally about my ex-husband verbally abusing me?
Yes. In a Nevada custody case you can ask the family court for a behavioral order that requires your ex to confine his communications to matters concerning the children, in decent language, with penalties attached to further violations. Before filing, build the record: save and print every abusive text and email, use caller ID and do not answer, and keep any insulting voicemails. Then send a neutrally worded written warning that continued abuse will result in a return to court.
Can I record my ex's abusive phone calls in Nevada?
Keeping voicemails and recorded messages your ex leaves is perfectly allowable, because he chose to record them himself. Do not, however, secretly tape a live telephone conversation; in Nevada, recording a live phone call without the other party’s consent is not allowed, and doing so can hurt your case rather than help it. Rely instead on texts, emails, voicemails and call logs, which are all fair game as evidence.
What is a behavioral order in a Nevada family court case?
A behavioral order is an order from the family court directing a parent how to conduct himself toward the other parent, for example limiting communication to child-related matters in civil language. It is requested by motion, usually with the texts, emails and recordings that show the pattern of abuse, and it can include penalties for future violations. The motion can also ask that the abusive parent be ordered to pay the attorney’s fees caused by the return trip to court.
Should I send my ex a warning letter before going back to court over his harassment?
The firm recommends it. A short, neutrally worded letter telling your ex to keep his communications to the children and in decent language, and warning that you will return to court if he does not, costs little and strengthens your motion if the abuse continues. If it does continue, take the evidence to a qualified family law specialist and file for a behavioral order. Willick Law Group can review your situation in a consultation.
Marshal S. Willick
Latest posts by Marshal S. Willick (see all)